All Was Connected

Psychosis, and the recovery time after, has a strange symptom. A sense of grandeur. A feeling as if you are spiritually connected to all around you. A feeling of telekinetic powers. For me, anyway. During this time I met a horse. A neighbor of my father’s property in Tennessee. “A mean horse,” my father had…

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Dogs Say Nothing

The day before we left that hotel in Arkansas Bella broke a nail. It had gotten caught in a grate that covered a drainage slope in the sidewalk near the laundry room. We were leaving the next day. Bella refused to walk on her foot, so S. carried her. He loaded her into the truck…

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A Reminiscing Essay

With the spirit in mind that this blog is a record, a series of essays is to follow, written mostly for my own benefit. Maybe they’ll strike you in some way. This is the story of the first meal I ever cooked. I was 22, engaged, and living in a hotel room while my fiance…

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Likes are Great

But nothing beats being with my kids. Nothing tops “Mama, mama, mama.” Nothing compares to making snacks for a little voice saying “Thank you very much.” Nothing is equal to playing on the floor with my two pups. Nothing satisfies quite like having my hair pulled and my pants tugged on. Likes are great but…

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Feliz Navidad

This year was a great Christmas. Our tree was a bit small, but laden with shatter-proof ornaments. I made tamales and we toasted to our children with a bit of champagne. I am following little ones around and finding it difficult to write much of anything. For this reason I say feliz navidad a few…

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My Dream Parte Dos

A man and a woman stand in the forest. They huddle. A baby lays on the soft ground between them. The man says that something is hunting them. The woman, listening instensely, nods in agreement. It is a large black dog, he assumes. She shakes her head and holds a finger to her lips. Looking…

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My Dream

There is a heron standing in the water. In the shallows. Near the bank. It is you. No. It is me. The heron stands on one foot. On your foot. No. Mine. There is an alligator swimming so slowly, silently, barely scraping the lake’s floor with it’s pale belly. It is you. No. It is…

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Remember Me

Hopefully, you do. If not, that’s okay, too. I have been suffering lately from a rare form of Post Partum Depression – something that I thought I had under control. But, looking back on things and the manic writing I was doing (the climate crisis has traumatized me because I am concerned for the futures…

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First Day

So, Dick was a real prick, right? He was old. His wife, Marcela, (no, I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP) was German (pretty positive) and she usually stayed inside. Dick’s place was off a scenic highway that led from one small town to a bigger city. A curvy road. Fun to drive, but oh, so dangerous.…

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Thinking on a Maria

What a disappointing night. I have a lot of stuff to do (for a lot of people) and I’m just pacing around, forgetting what I’m doing. The life of a “writer” is such a “romantic” one. I believe that anyone alive can write. Because writing makes you feel alive. Anyway! It’s time for some simple…

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Stop Saying Sorry If You’re Not Going to Stop

We have all made a mistake or two (or 7). We have all tried to learn from them. I know I’ve said something wrong before. I know I’ve said something worse. I never told you sorry, Because I don’t believe in those words. Instead, I planted the best garden I could Full of flowers that…

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Explicit Warning

I cannot read the Bible. I literally can’t (I’m taking that word back for myself ‘cuz there was nothing wrong with it. Try one pumpkin spice and everyone’s throwing up the same sentences – vague warning!). The Bible is in a language I don’t want to learn and uses archaic words. Personally, Bible quotes can…

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A Scientist is a Sinner. Or Is It?

Can you be so full of yourself? To believe in science? Can you be so arrogant? Sure, anyone can. Who owns the trademark on a moral? A value? An idea? A word? I don’t. But my thoughts are copyrighted because they’re original. Yep – there’s that arrogance again. But I never said I was a…

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The Next Morning

Did you cry after? Nah, I never do. I need nicotine, though. And the blackest coffee you can make. The only thing that can make me really cry is writing what I’ve just been keeping. Keeping for what? For who? Because why? You won’t like all that I have to say. So, I’ll get back…

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